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Wallace and Gromit?
more like "grimace at my wallet" !!

Touk boosted

And you may find yourself.. watching a teen unbox funko pops

And you may find yourself.. on a tour of bryce dallas howard’s glamorous LA home

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poor joke timing, I forgot this is the morning the court drops their new terrible decisions

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convincing my boss that, uhh, yeah, the Supreme Court made Go Skateboarding Day a federal holiday, no uhh they didn't talk about it much on the news, but yeah it's mandatory

the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was an absolutely _boosted_ switch heelflip over the handrail

but when will Chris Pratt be cast as the voice of... reason

rearranging "Tales from the Crypt" to get "The Tesla Crypto Mf'r"

seeing a freaky lil bug and thinking I should alert the entomologists

Wouldst thou like to live red deliciously 🍎

frantically pulling out my phone to type "under Seinfeld's justice system it would be trial by jerry"

Touk boosted

You ever just write Twilight Zone monologues in your head

▶️ Weird Al "Since You've Been Gone" ENDING EXPLAINED!

Touk boosted

:bing: upcoin crash meaning
:bing: upcoin value chart
:bing: upcoin value chart right side up
:bing:
:bing:
:bing: upcoin balloon analogy
:bing: can balloons float down

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Excuse me? I'm not sure what you mean... Upcoin can only "crash" upward.

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on the No Fly List for accidentally scanning @wandrew "world's rarest stamp" post instead of my boarding pass 😔

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smores.town

The second rule of smores town is: HAVE A NICE DAY.